Weekly Ultrasound Day!

I won't call it a "perk", but one of the few positive things about going through IVF is that you get to have ultrasounds once or twice a week for the first 10 or 12 weeks. Today was ultrasound day for me and it was exciting as always. Usually we try to have Briggs hang out with someone during our appointments, but today we brought him so he could get a glimpse at his brother or sister.

Our baby has grown a lot in the past week. I thought I was 9 weeks today, but I am actually 8w6d, so 9 weeks tomorrow! Baby now looks like a peanut with little arm and leg buds, and it was wiggling around during the ultrasound. It's SO neat to see the progress in the first trimester. I consider it a blessing to be able to see these stages of development because most people don't get to experience that. We have quite the collection of ultrasound photos around our house :)

Baby's heart rate was 166 again today. They usually say higher heart rates = GIRL, but Briggs had a really high one too, so we shall seeee.....!! Today they took me off of my Estrogen pills, and hopefully next week I can stop the Estrogen patches and the Progesterone. I will be one VERY happy momma if that happens! Next week's ultrasound is on Wednesday. Can't wait!

Little peanut with arm and leg buds! Looks like a gummy bear

 

I love this one because you can see the umbilical cord in the middle

Not your average conception

There are no "accidents" when it comes to Blake and I getting pregnant. Part of me has always hoped that after having one child, we would be that special infertile couple that magically got pregnant on their own the second time around...but that wasn't the case for us. We did give it some time, but we are not very patient people and we always knew that we wanted to have two children close in age, so in January we met with our RE (Reproductive Endocrinologist) to discuss our options for conceiving #2. We were lucky enough to have several frozen embryos, so our best bet was to proceed with a Frozen Embryo Transfer. Our RE basically told us that it would be about a six week process, then he sent us on our way and told us to come back when we were ready to begin. The only caveat was that I had to be completely weaned from breastfeeding before I could begin taking all the necessary hormones, so I reluctantly began weaning Briggs around 8 months. It wasn't until he was 10 months old that I successfully weaned him.

In April we were nervous, but ready to begin. Here is an outline of our journey!

Step 1: Hysteroscopy
Since I have had a previous pregnancy, and a Cesarean delivery, my RE felt it necessary to do another hysteroscopy this time around. Apparently a lot can change in your uterus after you grow a human in there! This procedure is not a big deal, but they do put you under general anesthesia for it, so it causes a little anxiety for me. They go in with a camera and look at everything, much like a colonoscopy. Luckily everything was fine and I got the "all clear" to proceed.

Step 2: Begin Medications
Thankfully an FET does not require them to stimulate the ovaries, so while you still have to take a LOT of hormones, it's not quite as intense as a fresh IVF cycle. I was put on Estrogen patches, Estrogen tablets 3x a day, and Progesterone in Oil injections once a day for a few weeks before my Embryo transfer. The progesterone injections are HORRENDOUS. The shot itself doesn't actually hurt, even though you have to use a very large needle, but the aftermath is awful!!!!! I can only compare the soreness of your ass to that of being hit with a baseball bat over and over again. Add to that the fact that the progesterone crystallizes and creates giant LUMPS in your hip/butt area, and you've got yourself a pretty miserable combo. Blake had to give me these shots and I dreaded it every.single.night.

Step 3: Embryo Transfer
My FET was scheduled for 5/29/12. We went back and forth on whether to transfer one or two embryos, but ultimately my Doctor helped us realize that one embryo would be safer for me considering the complicated pregnancy I had with Briggs. I was a little nervous about only transferring one because I wanted to maximize my chances of getting pregnant, but I knew it was the right choice. When I woke up that morning I was so anxious and excited. Blake and I both felt very optimistic and we knew it would be a great day! Everything went smoothly, and after the transfer I returned home for 72 hours of strict bed rest. Big thanks to Grandma Susu and Honey for helping take care of my wild monkey while I was on bed rest :)  It was worth it!

Step 4: 2 Week Wait, and Beta Results
Anyone who has struggled with infertility knows that the 2 week wait is PURE HELL. They make you wait around for 2 weeks before drawing your blood to check your HCG Beta to confirm whether or not you're pregnant. It's a LONG 2 weeks, that's for sure! Leave it to me to take about 37 home pregnancy tests during the 2ww. Ok, maybe I only took 9.

On June 12th I finally went in for my blood-draw. I was SO nervous about it, but I was pretty optimistic since my 9 HPTs had been positive :)   Later that day we got the call we were hoping for...and just like last time, they called and told me I was "VERY pregnant". Apparently Blake and I make very strong embryos!!! My Beta was extremely high, which doesn't necessarily mean a whole lot, but to me it confirms that I have a superhero baby in my belly.


So here we are...tomorrow is July 12th and I will be 9 weeks pregnant. My due date is VALENTINES DAY, but if this baby is anything like Briggs, it will probably make it's debut much earlier than that ;)  Last week Baby's heart rate was 166, so it looks like we've got another WILD one in there! Blake and I are so thrilled, and so thankful for all the support. We hope that sharing our story and our struggles will help someone else who's going through the same thing. We have been blessed, but it hasn't always been the easiest road. My hope is that any and all couples who struggle with infertility are able to find a way to achieve that perfect family they've always wanted.

Stay tuned for Baby updates here! What will it be...Boy or Girl???

Little Guy In A Tie Party

I LOVE planning parties, and I always go overboard, but this party was so much fun for me to plan and execute because it was my Son's FIRST Birthday! A BIG DEAL in this household :)  I'm pretty sure I started planning this party when he was 6 months old, and I definitely went a little overboard for a 1st birthday, but it was all worth it! At first I wasn't sure what theme I wanted to go with for him, but after hours of scientific research on Pinterest, I decided on the "Little Guy In A Tie" theme. Once I decided on that, I hit the ground running, and had a BLAST planning every aspect of the party.

A TON of my inspiration came from this beautiful baby blessing: Kara's Party Ideas

I knew I wanted a brighter color scheme, so I quickly decided to stick with bright shades of Blue, Green, and Orange, which are the same colors I used in Briggs' modern nursery.

The party went off without a hitch and everyone had a blast! We rented a moonwalk for the older kids, which ended up being a great investment (I highly recommend this!). If you're in the Houston area, I rented my moonwalk from Moonwalk Wonders. The pricing was great, and they were wonderful to work with. My rental even included 3 tables and 24 chairs which REALLY came in handy for eating space! Here are some pics from the party...Unfortunately Blogger messes up the order of my pictures, so I apologize for the random order of photos!

Main Dessert Table

Key Lime Cupcakes with Fabric Toppers

For lunch we had Potbelly Sandwiches and Chips served in Gable Boxes

Party Favor Table

Photo Booth Fun

More Photo Booth Fun

1-12 Month Photo Banner

Streamers Photo Display

Birthday Boy!

Yummy Cake!

Family Photo

Birthday Outfit

First Year Milestones

Birthday Banner

Custom Birthday Hat

Tie Cookies

Strict Dress Code! Handmade ties.

 

Vendor Credits:

• All Printables (food tent cards, cupcake toppers, gable box labels, water bottle labels): Etsy seller Paper and Pigtails
• Tie Cookies: Etsy seller Bees Knees Creative
• "Happy Birthday Handsome" Banner: Etsy seller That's So Cute
• Tie Onesie: Etsy seller Antsy Pants
• Birthday Hat: Etsy seller Dainty Couture
• Gable Boxes: Bags and Bows
• Clear boxes for animal cracker favors: Paper Mart
• Cupcakes: Made by my friend Mel with Heartbreak Cupcakes
• 12 Month photo banner: handmade by me
• Smash Cake: Three Bro's Bakery in Houston
• Moonwalk Rental: Moonwalk Wonders

Hope you like the pictures! I had so much fun with this party. If I'm leaving anything out, or you have any questions, let me know!

Infertiles, Unite!

If there's anything I've learned while dealing with infertility it's that we "infertiles" NEED a strong support system. Some couples are more open about their journey, while others choose to be private. There is no right or wrong way to deal with infertility, but the bottom line is it flat out sucks for everyone involved. That being said, in my experience I have found that reaching out to women who can relate has helped me tremendously. When I first embarked on the journey of IF (infertility) treatments, I started researching on the web and found an amazing support group through an online community. Most of us never have and probably never will meet, however, we have a profound understanding and appreciation for the struggles we have all been through. Everybody's story is different and regardless of their reatment protocal, every one's journey is equally difficult, painful, and exhausting. We share an ultimate goal of being a Mother, whether it be through IUI, IVF, Surrogacy, or Adoption, we all want to be a mother more than anything, and we are willing to put ourselves through HELL to achieve that dream. I want to share one of my favorite quotes that always helps me have a better perspective when I start feeling down about the cards we were dealt:

"Anyone can give up, it's the easiest thing in the world to do. But to hold it together when everyone would understand if you fell apart; that's true strength." --Unknown

A friend of mine posted a link to a blog today that really impacted me. This woman is sharing her story and she does it beautifully. I couldn't have said it better myself, so I wanted to share it with my friends and family too. Here is the link to her blog, and for easy reading I have included the post below as well. Enjoy!

The 2 Week Wait

Don't Ignore...

This week is National Infertility Awareness Week and the fine people at RESOLVE have challenged Bloggers to write a blog post with the theme of “Don’t Ignore Infertility”. More specifically, we were asked to start our post with, “Don’t Ignore…” and then fill in the blank as it relates to the disease of infertility and the journey to resolution.

Exactly three months ago, I gave birth to a baby boy that I achieved through my third IVF. My husband and I never received a diagnosis (other than, “It sucks to be you.”) and on our last in vitro, we only had one embryo to show for it. I’m proud to say that the one embryo is currently smiling and drooling on his “One Good Egg” onesie.

Those who follow my blog though know that the third in vitro cycle was the one where I had the least amount of hope, the least amount of finances and I dare say the least amount of sanity I had ever had before. When I think of “Don’t Ignore…”, it’s impossible for me to come up with just one thing as a flood of feelings, thoughts and emotions overwhelm me. There are so many aspects to infertility that not only we as a community ignore, but that the rest of the world does too. It all makes me think of my two current favorite quotes. The first not only accurately describes my feelings on my journey through infertility, one that spanned approximately three years, but it also would be my advice to those who are still in the thick of it. It’s, “I’m not saying it’s going to be easy. I’m saying it’s going to be worth it.” The second quote is from RuPaul and is, “My goal is to always come from a place of love ...but sometimes you just have to break it down for a mother*cker.” Amen sister!

The first quote reminds those struggling to get pregnant that although the process can be long, arduous, painful and so many other non-fun adjectives, once you become a mother, it is worth it. It won’t matter if it’s through insemination, in vitro, donor eggs, adoption, etc. If you want to be a mom, although it may not be the way you had hoped or planned, once you hold that child in your arms, it won’t matter. You will be a mom.

The second quote speaks to the rest of the world who asks couples, “When are you going to have kids already?” in front of their families at a relative’s baby shower or random guests at cocktail parties who give such genius unsolicited medical advice like, “Have you had tried having sex and leaving your socks on? That’s what got me pregnant!” Quite often, the “fertile community at large” doesn’t stop and say, “Hmmm. Here’s a couple that don’t have kids and they don’t talk about it. Maybe making comments, giving advice or asking personal questions can be insensitive, rude and hurtful?”

And even worse, when the “fertile community at large” DOES know you have an issue and tries to comfort you by saying, “Just relax and it will happen…”, that’s when, as RuPaul implies, you need to break it down for them and say, “I realize you heard a story about your sister getting pregnant after she tried acupuncture but different things work for different people. Ultimately, we’re in good hands with our Reproductive Endocrinologist. Thanks anyway for the tip.”

Keeping all of this in mind, here is my personal list of what I feel shouldn’t be ignored:

Don’t Ignore that Others Need to be Educated: Infertility is a real medical issue that can’t be pushed aside by some stupid piece of advice. If you confide in someone that you’re having fertility issues and they suggest an herb or that you weren’t meant to have kids, don’t accept that. I’m not saying start arguments with everyone but rather, take a deep breath and look at it as an opportunity to educate. For example, I can’t tell you how many people I had to explain the difference between ‘transferring’ an embryo and ‘implanting’ an embryo or what exactly is ICSI or that suggesting adoption to someone who may not yet be considering it isn't helpful. Because of mine and my husband's willingness to be open, my family and friends have learned so much that they weren't aware of. Just by sharing our story, we are advocates of educating others about infertility. I'm proud and happy to report that when these same family and friends encountered other people who are dealing with infertility (which believe it or not, they all did), they were way more sensitive and informed.

Don’t Ignore Each Other: There is an understanding that infertiles share even without actually having met one another. We know the feelings of disappointment, shame, frustration and heartbreak. You don’t have to feel alone as there are so many out there who understand, relate and can help you with what you’re going through. Whether it’s through a support group, Twitter, a blog or a chat room -- reach out, share and cheer each other on. I also urge you to not play the “Whose Pain is Worse Contest" with one another. It doesn’t matter and it doesn’t help. We all have different experiences, wins and losses but ultimately, we must stick together. After all, how can we expect the world to support us if we can’t support each other?

Don’t Ignore What You’ve Accomplished: There are many who have struggled with infertility and went on to have healthy babies that wouldn’t mind putting it behind them. Although I totally understand this, I don’t feel that way. Infertility was a huge, major part of my life for quite some time. It put my marriage, my body, my checking account and my sense of humor through hell. Yes, I have a baby now but I can never turn my back on those who are still in the trenches nor could I forget what I went through. It doesn’t take away the joy I feel over my son… if anything, it reminds me how much perseverance and patience can pay off. I take great pride in sharing with anyone and everyone that I had a very difficult time getting pregnant but it did happen and I’m so very grateful. To be clear though, even if you’re still working towards starting a family, that doesn’t mean you haven’t accomplished a whole freaking lot. You should be extremely proud of the process you are putting yourself through… which leads me to my next, “Don’t Ignore…”

Don’t Ignore the Strength You Have: No matter where you’re at in the trying to get knocked up rollercoaster, I promise you – you’re stronger than you think. I’ve met so many beyond amazing women who have been through situations and scenarios that I didn’t even know that were possible and they somehow made it through. Find a theme song, indulge in a guilty pleasure, get your nails done, schedule a therapy session and have a romantic dinner out where you DON’T discuss your cervical mucus. Fight the good fight as we all have it within us. I’ve said it once and I’ll say it again; women who have infertility issues ARE the Masters of the Uterus. We are superheros who willingly subject ourselves to physical torture, who endure tests and conversations that are truly unpleasant and who keep going in the hopes of fulfilling our dreams of motherhood. We not only all deserve rewards, we all deserve babies.

Don't Ignore the LOGO Channel: I realize this is a slightly silly point but one I feel compelled to make... especially to those who are currently going through a cycle. Each time I did one of my inseminations or an in vitro, the LOGO channel was my best friend during my two week wait. Being that it is considered the "gay channel", there are, for whatever reason, no commercials about pregnancy tests or what's the best diaper. There are no sitcoms or plot lines where someone gets knocked up by being sneezed on or any reality shows about people with 500 kids. There are commericals mainly for plant food and excercise equipment, plus, you can watch one of my favorite shows, RuPaul's Drag Race, where everyone is beautiful with the help of some make-up and duct tape. It is a fun escape that will not only distract you from your follicle count, but it will make you want to run out, buy false eyelashes and dance to some disco.

Don’t Ignore Hope: Friedrich Nietzsche once said, “Hope is the worst of evils, for it prolongs the torment of man.” Although this isn’t a light hearted fun quote (I sense Nietzsche was not fun at parties), it was one I thought of often when trying to get pregnant. It’s so hard to hope as we all know that infertility makes no promises. Things don’t always work out. Not everyone gets the happy ending they deserve. However, given our options, it’s better to have hope then to have none at all. I also believe with all of my heart that although things may not be the way we had expected, it doesn’t make it any less rewarding. There may be a conclusion to your journey that isn’t at all what you imagined but that will surpass your wildest dreams. Perhaps in the end, we shouldn’t hope for what we want. We should hope for the best possible outcome… whatever that is.

Lastly, Don’t Ignore the Gift of Humor: Again, regular readers of my blog know how often I employed making jokes to cope. IVF for me stood for “I’m Very Fertile” or “I’m Very Funny” depending on what day it was. When they found I had a uterine polyp, I named him Jackson Polyp and gave him his own Twitter account. Once, I was at a restaurant and the waitress asked me how I wanted my eggs and I told her, “Fertilized and implanted, thank you.” It’s not easy but to make light of the situation is the only way to go. Never ignore an opportunity for a good joke. Your sanity will thank you for it.

During National Infertility Awareness Week, I plan on not only sharing my journey with others through Twitter, Facebook (on both my real life account and my infertility account) and here on my blog, but I’m also working on something I’m very proud of called the “Infertility Sponsorship Program” (check back next week for the details). I will also spend this week trying to find clothes that fit, locate a cream that gets rid of cellulite and preparing to go back to work after maternity leave. NOTE TO SELF: Remember not to burp my fellow co-workers after they eat lunch.

To my regular blog readers, I’m so sorry for being out of touch this last month or so. One of the good things about having to go back to work is I’ll have more time to blog on my lunch hour!

For now, here are two links about National Infertility Awareness Week and Resolve:

http://www.resolve.org/infertility101

http://www.resolve.org/national-infertility-awareness-week/about.html

Mother's Day Recap

I could love and squeeze this boy all.day.long. Briggs and his Daddy made sure to spoil me for my first Mother's Day! I am so thankful for these two -- they don't even know how much they mean to me. I am amazed by Blake's thoughtfulness and attention to detail when it comes to "special occasions". He does a very good job of making me feel loved! THANKS DADDY! :)

This month I find myself constantly reminiscing about what was happening at this time last year. May 2011 was one of the most eventful months in my life. I was working on Mother's Day last year, and the next day I had a routine check up with my OB for my 32 week appointment. Despite feeling a little bit "off" for a while, I thought I was totally fine and that my pregnancy was going well. Turns out I had been having a LOT of contractions and didn't even know it (I thought it was just Briggs stretching and moving a lot in my belly). At my appointment my OB decided to send me to Labor & Delivery and that's where things started to get a little crazy. For the next 4 weeks I was in and out of the hospital numerous times, and when I wasn't in the hospital, I was at home on STRICT bedrest with in-home fetal monitoring. On top of the preterm labor issues, I was diagnosed with IUGR (intrauterine growth restriction) and Briggs stopped growing. The Doctors suspected that there were major placenta issues, but they were holding out as long as possible before deciding to deliver this crazy little man. It was chaotic, to say the least! I cooked him as long as possible, but in the middle of the night on June 5th, my water broke and Briggs made his debut shortly after that.

I think Mother's Day will always remind me of that eventful time in my life. Now we've come full circle, and here I am celebrating my first Mother's Day with an almost one-year-old! I cannot believe how time flies, and I am completely in awe of what a funny, smart, little human being my beautiful Son is. I am so excited to see what the future holds for him. It's bound to be a bright one :)

Being a mommy is my favorite thing in the world. I cannot imagine a better blessing. Thank you, God, for choosing ME to be Briggs' mommy, and thank you for giving me a reason to celebrate on Mother's Day!

Kennedy is ONE!

Today I had the pleasure of taking pictures of one of Briggs' BFFs, Kennedy. She turned 1 on April 5th, so we wanted to capture some fun outdoor pics of this sweet ONE YEAR OLD. She was a trooper and a very easy photography subject. Love you Kennedy! Enjoy :)

Our first trip to the Houston Zoo

Finally, after weeks of SAYING we were going to go, we finally WENT to the zoo! I was so excited to take Briggs to see all the animals, but I have to admit, I was even more excited to see them myself. I can't even remember the last time I went to the Houston Zoo...probably at least 15 years ago. WOW that makes me feel old!

We had a fun time as a family, but man, was it exhausting! Briggs was calm and relaxed the entire time and he loved seeing the animals, but once we got home we were all spent. Daddy bought us a family membership, so I plan on taking Briggs back very often. Maybe even once a week until it gets too hot. Next on our to-do list is to go in the morning so we can see the elephants get their baths, and we also want to feed the giraffes. Being a kid is fun! Can't wait till our next trip... maybe this week! ;)

Elephant butts!

Snack time for the elephants

Bongo Drums

Hangin with the chimps

Daddy's showing me the little monkeys

Inspired by Avery

I am so unbelievably touched and inspired by the Canahuati Family. I do not know them, but I wish I did. A friend posted a link to their blog on facebook the other night, and I am so glad I clicked on it. They have found a way to make me EVEN MORE grateful for the gift of life, and more specifically, the gift of motherhood. They have a beautiful 5 month old daughter, Avery, who was just diagnosed with SMA. Sadly, she has a very short life expectancy, but her wonderful, devoted parents have set out to make EVERY second count in sweet Avery's life. Their story is truly admirable. I hope that Blake and I can be half the parents that they are being for their precious daughter.

Please take a moment to look at their blog, and help Avery spread the word about SMA. Share this with everyone you know. While it won't save her in this lifetime, she's hoping that her story will bring awareness to the genetic disorder so that we CAN find a cure and eventually save other children who are born with SMA. Here's the link to her blog:

Avery Can

Avery and her parents have compiled a very extensive "Bucket List" of things she wants to accomplish in her short life. Her parents are nothing short of extraordinary and I admire their strength and courage during this difficult time. Their approach to making sure Avery lives the most rewarding life possible is simply amazing! They have inspired me in numerous ways, but perhaps most importantly, they are spreading the message of not taking life for granted. Today I was watching videos on their blog that brought me to tears -- tears of happiness for the joy that they are currently experiencing with their daughter, and tears of sadness for the inevitable pain they will face all too soon. If nothing else, they can surely inspire us all to live every day like it's our last.

In honor of Avery, I am putting together a list of the things I am MOST grateful for in my life. I could go on forever about things I am thankful for, but this list is specifically things that I cannot live without. After this I am going to make sure I spend every day SHOWING my gratitude for these beautiful blessings in my life, and above all else, I am devoting myself to making sure that Briggs laughs everyday, plays like there's no tomorrow, and is smothered by hugs and kisses because he is so unbelievably loved.

ALSO In honor of Avery, Briggs and I danced around the living room like maniacs today! IT WAS A BLAST! We will definitely be doing that more often. I hope that Briggs can meet sweet Avery one of these days. She lives in Houston...so mommy might have to figure out a way to make that happen :)

Things I am forever grateful for:

• My loving Husband
• My BEAUTIFUL, cheerful, playful, giggly, cuddly, smiley, talkative, healthy BABY BOY
• The ability to undergo Infertility Treatments to achieve my dreams of having children
• My dedicated parents who selflessly sacrificed many things in life to give their 4 children everything they ever wanted and needed
• My 3 brothers who beat me up and picked on me all my life
• All of our loving family - Aunts, Uncles, Cousins, etc.
• The best Grandparents Briggs could every ask for
• A job that allows me to live the most fulfilling life possible
• Friends who I have fun with no matter what we're doing
• Baby smiles
• Baby laughs
• Stinky dog kisses
• Sunshine
• Sweating
• My cozy home
• Music for dancing
• Clean drinking water and fresh air
• The ability to run
• Naps with my baby
• Briggs' smile
• Eskimo kisses
• Dancing around like a maniac with Briggs in my arms
• June 13, 2009 - My wedding day
• June 5, 2011 - The day Briggs was born

I'm sure there are many more things I need to add to this list, but it's a start. I really want to take time  to stop and smell the roses more often, and I also want to do everything in my power to provide Briggs with the most rewarding life possible. From now on my #1 priority is to have FUN everyday!

Hug your babies, kiss your spouses, and tell your family you love them :)   And send all of your extra thoughts and prayers to Avery and her amazing parents. They deserve it.

Breastfeeding - My 10 Month Experience

When I was pregnant I made up my mind that I wanted to breastfeed Briggs. I never really knew if it would work out for me or how long I'd stick with it, but I knew I wanted to do it. I had heard HORROR stories about how awful and difficult breastfeeding was, so I was quite nervous and had little confidence that it would work for me. Despite what I had heard, I made up my mind that I was going to breastfeed and it was going to be EASY for me! I did loads of research and attended the breastfeeding class at my hospital, and by the end  of my pregnancy I was very confident and excited about giving my child the best nourishment he could possibly have. I set an initial goal of breastfeeding Briggs for 6 months.

The power of positive thinking must be real because I ended up having a very easy and rewarding breastfeeding experience from start to finish. In the beginning I was concerned that Briggs wouldn't latch properly since he was born prematurely, but to my surprise he latched like a champ right after I got out of recovery from my C-Section, and it was all smooth sailing from there. I never got sore or cracked nipples (sorry for the TMI but it's relevant in this case), and I was blessed with a great milk supply. One of the best things I learned in my breastfeeding class was that if it hurts, the latch is wrong! I think so many people are so desperate to make it work and they don't take the time to make sure they get the latch right. This is CRUCIAL for a pleasant and rewarding breastfeeding experience, so mommas, do your research and attend a breastfeeding class!

Before long Briggs was 6 months old and had never even had a drop of formula. I was so proud of myself and so happy that I was able to successfully achieve my goal. I quickly realized that I now had a very strong emotional attachment to breastfeeding and I was definitely not ready to give it up...so I continued. I did, however, slowly try to introduce formula so that Briggs could get used to it... THAT was a whole new challenge!!  Turns out I had spoiled him too much with "delicious" breast milk and he wanted nothing to do with that nasty stuff. Can't blame him! After numerous attempts at giving him different brands of formula, I finally found the ONE and only type he would drink -- Similac Organic. Can we say "high-maintenance"!?

In February I started to notice my health deteriorating. I was losing weight rapidly and I was constantly feeling fatigued and exhausted. I knew that 8 months of BFing was starting to take it's toll on me. Everything was literally being sucked out of me. At that point I made the decision to start weaning for the sake of my own health, and for other reasons as well. It wasn't an easy decision, but I knew it was for the best.

I knew weaning wouldn't be easy but I had NO idea what an emotional toll it would take on me. I have to admit, the  process probably would have gone a lot smoother and quicker if I hadn't had so much anxiety over it all. The idea of being done with pumping and nursing was great, but my hormones and emotions were all over the place. I sort of felt like I was cheating Briggs by not giving him breast milk anymore. I know that sounds silly, but it's how I felt.  At this point I had gone several months with nursing Briggs 4 or 5 times a day, so it was quite difficult to start cutting out the feedings and replacing them with a bottle of formula. Weaning was a long, drawn out process for me, but I had to take it slow.

Here we are, April 5, 2012...10 months to the day that Briggs was born and I started breastfeeding. My supply is pretty much gone now and I'm considering myself "weaned" even though I still nurse him for a few minutes in the morning when he wakes up. I guess this whole thing is bittersweet, and that's why I'm writing about it. I want to share my experience in hopes that it encourages other "first-time moms" to give breastfeeding a fair shot. Even though I'm sad to say goodbye to nursing, I'm so thankful that I had so much success with it and that I was able to give my son everything he needed for the first 10 months of his life. In my experience, breastfeeding is absolutely, 100% worth it, for both mom AND baby. There's no way to explain the bond that it creates between you and your baby, but it's one that is undeniable and everlasting. So now I close this chapter with Briggs as he begins to grow into toddler-hood and I look forward to having the same success with nursing all of my future children :)

P.S. A great resource for any and all info on breastfeeding can be found here: Kelly Mom

DIY Chalkboards

I have recently become obsessed with Chalkboard spray paint. You can pretty much turn anything into a chalkboard. How fun is that? I decided that I needed something to take up space on the side of my refrigerator, but I was tired of clutter, so naturally I decided that a chalkboard was necessary.

I went to Michael's and bought this swirly wood frame thing, along with the most basic 11x14 in. picture frame I could find. I basically wanted the picture frame JUST so I could use the glass portion and spray paint it.  I added magnet strips to the back of the glass, then sprayed the front of it with chalkboard paint. I spray painted the wooden swirly frame white...and voila!

Before:

From this...

After:

To THIS! Fun for writing sweet notes or making a grocery list.

The other place I envisioned a new chalkboard was in Briggs' playroom, which was our former dining room. We had a  large outdated mirror in there that was begging for a makeover, SO, I turned to my trusty spray paint and sprayed the frame white and the mirror Chalkboard (duh). The mirror needed several coats of chalkboard paint. It didn't turn out perfect (there's some lumps and bumps because I sprayed it outside) but it will suffice for Briggs to play with when he gets older!

Before:

The frame was gold, but I forgot to take a pic of that. This is it with blue painters tape all over.

After:

For fun I added Briggs' Playroom Rules ;)

I advise you to go buy some chalkboard spray paint and start transforming old mirrors, frames, whatever into fun chalkboards!

A (little) man's best friend

Briggs and Nala are a match made in Heaven. He LOVES this dog, and she loves him.

Nala is completely deaf, and is what we like to call "special". She is one of the sweetest, but WILDEST dogs I have ever known. When Briggs was born I was worried that she would be nuts around him, but it's just the opposite. She protects him, watches over him, and gently plays with him. They definitely have a special bond and I can't wait to see them play together as Briggs grows up.

Briggs and Nala 3/2/12

Say It Ain't So...

Bad behavior from my SWEET little man????

NO!!! NEVER!!

Ok. Maybe it's true. Well, I wouldn't call it BAD behavior because obviously an 8 month old doesn't know good vs. bad, but lately he has been fighting me on every.single.thing. It is very frustrating to have a little one go from being a perfect angel to being Dennis the Menace in a flash!

He is fighting sleep, fighting his feedings, and throwing tantrums when he doesn't get his way. He's also experiencing some serious separation anxiety these days. If I'm not in his sight, he'll start screaming 9 times out of 10. Don't get me wrong, I love feeling wanted by my baby, but I also want him to be happy, confident, and independent. He is at the prime age for separation anxiety, so I know this is just a phase and I have to keep reminding myself that "This too shall pass".

So what's my solution? Well, in order to keep my sanity, I'm going back to square one. My plan is to re-focus on his feeding/sleeping schedule to get that back on track, and re-directing his attention when he gets upset and frustrated. I don't want to be "that" mother who's constantly yelling "No!" when he gets into something he shouldn't, so instead I'm going to focus on teaching him right from wrong by reinforcing good behavior and ignoring bad behavior.

I am setting my intention to be patient, empathetic, and understanding with my children, while also teaching them how to be happy, confident, independent individuals. I know if I focus just a little extra attention on this I will have my sweet angel back in no time, and Briggs will be able to SHINE once again! I absolutely love being a mommy and I cannot wait to watch my children grow and thrive.

Oh, and one more thing that will help me get through some of the more frustrating times...more WINE! Who's drinking with me!? It's all for the LOVE of this little man.

How can I resist that PRECIOUS little face!? Goodness, I love him.

DIY Painted Canvas for Playroom

Leave it to Pinterest to make me addicted to crafting.

That being said, I saw a canvas project a while back on Pinterest and I knew I wanted to make something similar for my play room. I also knew that I wanted to use it on my Family Photo Gallery Wall that I was planning, so I had to select the appropriate size canvas for my project.

I ended up selecting a white 24 x 36" canvas from Michaels and I spray painted it BLACK. I did a few coats to make sure it was fully covered, and once it was completely dry I sanded it down with a sheet of sand paper to give it a rustic look. Here's what it looked like after sanding.

For the letters, I ordered some foam stamps online because I couldn't find them in a store ANYWHERE, and I used white acrylic paint.  

I wanted a "worn" look for the letters, so I dabbed them in the paint and then blotted them on a paper towel before stamping them on the canvas. I planned my words out in advance, but I didn't put much thought into the spacing. I just kinda rolled with it as I went along.

Here's the final result. I like the imperfections...they add character ;)

This project was relatively easy and ended up being PERFECT for my Gallery Frame Wall! I tried to think of phrases that would mean something to Briggs as he grows, and I love how it turned out. You'll see the Family Photo Gallery Wall in completion in a post coming soon :)



Kitchen Remodel

I am THRILLED about this long-awaited post! Ever since we bought our house nearly 4 years ago, I have hoped and dreamed of having an updated kitchen. Not a day went by that I didn't complain about my kitchen. I always told Blake I would cook more if I had a kitchen worthy of cooking in ;)  Guess I have no excuses now!

We started fixing up our kitchen piece by piece. First we replaced the nasty vinyl floors, then eventually we replaced all of the appliances. Finally we demolished and replaced the awful brown tile counter tops with BROWN grout and we also refaced all of the cabinets. Oh my, what a difference it makes. Take a look!

BEFORE

Brown tile counters & backsplash, brown grout, green walls, and ancient cabinets.
I used to have to VACUUM my countertops to get them even remotely clean. Gross.

Another view. Excuse the mess.

We're not finished with the BEFORE pictures yet. Awful sink. Even more awful backsplash.

DEMOLITION!!!!

And...drumroll please...

AFTER

Granite countertops (Santa Cecilia), Shaker Style cabinets, Tumbled Travertine backsplash, and a fresh coat of paint (Sherwin Williams -- Universal Khaki)

New sink and fixtures

LOVE my new kitchen!

So there you have it. My beautiful cook-worthy kitchen! Our contractor was a friend of a friend and he and his guys were fantastic. Let me know if you need his number. You can find some of his info here.

That's all for now! Stay tuned for pics from some DIY projects I've been working on. Come over and see my new kitchen. I'll cook for you ;)